oh end of the year surveys...

What did you do in 2006 that you've never done before?
went to a club, went to Mexico and California, went "away" to college

Did you keep your New Year's resolutions and will you make more for next year?
well, since I don't remember if I had a resolution or what it was if I did, that's probably a no

Did anyone close to you give birth?
April and Kim!!

Did anyone close to you die?
thankfully, not this year

What countries did you visit?
Mexico and L.A. which is basically like a different country

What would you like to have in 2007 that you lacked in 2006?
stable income

What dates from 2006 will remain etched in your memory and why?
February 7--tattoo, February 14--first Bon Jovi show, February 15--fell down the stairs and almost broke my ankle (but heard the Bachelor, Dr. Travis, page someone over the intercom in the Vanderbilt ER), May 5--Elena, June 29--Malachi!!, July 21--Bon Jovi in Chicago (Jon looked at me and smiled!!), November 6--Good Morning America (I was 6' away from JBJ)

What was your biggest achievement of the year?
having the courage to leave Lipscomb and step out in faith and embrace the future

What was your biggest failure?
an 80 on my American Fiction midterm (my study buddy made a 98...grr) I was very upset

Did you suffer illness or injury?
February 15--fell down the stairs...don't recommend it...
and various illnesses (ear infections, strep throat, sinus infections galore, nothing too major)

What was the best thing you bought?
well, my mom bought me my silver ring, that's probably the best
Ohhhh--Bon Jovi tickets and fan club membership

Where did most of your money go?
books and Bon Jovi stuff...and Panera

What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Chicago and Malachi and Bon Jovi

What do you wish you'd done more of?
ummm...probably study, although my grades were pretty good for not doing any

What do you wish you'd done less of?
probably sleep

How did you spend Christmas?
doing nothing. we opened presents early, so there wasn't anything left on Christmas day...

Did you fall in love in 2006?
not overly

What was your favorite TV show?
Grey's Anatomy

What was the best book you read?
Absalom, Absalom! (Faulkner), and Hebron Journal (Art Gish), and Searching for God Knows What (Don Miller)

What was your greatest musical discovery of 2006?
Neil Young (I found Bon Jovi in late 2005)

What did you want and get?
awesome Bon Jovi experiences

What did you want and not get?
a boyfriend (and a picture with and autograph from JBJ...)

What was your favorite film this year?
V for Vendetta

What did you do on your birthday?
went to Cheesecake Factory

What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
I don't know...

How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2006?
mmmm comfortable--pajama pants that look like real pants and jeans and tshirts.

What kept you sane?
Kim and sweet little Malachi, and Muffy

Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
do I even have to write his name? Jon Bon Jovi (but also Patrick Dempsey....)

What political issue stirred you the most?
well, I know what stirred Kim the most when I commented on it...haha

Who did you miss?
my Granny

Who was the best new person you met?
Rachel Rose

Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2006.
God is always faithful. ALWAYS

Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
"Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road, life grabs you by the wrist, directs you where to go, so make the best of this test and don't ask why, it's not a question but a lesson learned in time. It's something unpredictable but in the end it's right, I hope you have the time of your life."

wow.

I'm watching this show on the History channel about drugs, and I just learned that cocaine has a 17,000% mark up. That is insane. 17,000%--if you can make it for a dollar, you can charge 17 grand for it!?!?! wow.

anger!

Ooooo--I am so mad right now! When I'm angry my muscles twitch, and I look like I have tourettes right now. Aghhh. I've always been closer to my mom's dad than her mom, but today I learned that he's just as big a jerk as she is. Awesome.

Well there are many things I was going to post, but I am so mad right now I can't really concentrate. I'm looking at apartments. Coming home last week was a real wakeup call. It's time to get my own place. Seriously. But first I definitely need a job....grr. So this whole working to pay for some of my college may not work out so well if I'm going to be paying rent and utilities and groceries and all that...hmmm. We shall see.

various updates and thoughts.

It's been a while since I've updated, and a ton of stuff has happened. Most all of you know that my dad is in the hospital, but I will write about it anyway. He had his gall bladder taken out Friday afternoon. He has an 8" incision!! That is massive. It's stapled instead of stitched. Ouch!

I took my Bible final this morning. It wasn't too bad. Whenever I didn't know the answer to something I would remind myself that I'm transferring and Honors Corinthians won't transfer, so it doesn't really matter. I don't know if my GPA will transfer or not...it didn't from Memphis. Just the credits that did transfer kept the letter grade that went with them. So that's fine. Had my bio final this afternoon--I spanked it. That has been such an easy class. I haven't taken a single note the whole semester, and I most definitely have an A. That's pretty awesome. All I had to do was show up and sit there. And lots of days I fell asleep or read for American Fictions. That is the class I am rather worried about. I probably have a B. But a C is a possibility. That's no fun. Here are my predictions for my grades: B in Bible, B in French, B in Am Fic, A in Comm, A in Bio, A (maybe B because of attendance) in A Cappella. Not bad. Not awesome, but not bad. And guess who's on chapel probation? ME! Good thing I'm not coming back next semester, because I would be losing my scholarship if I was. That's no good. That fact makes leaving a plus. I had lunch with Rachel Rose today. She is one of about 3 real friends I have here at LU. That is incredibly sad. I so do not fit the demographic here. I have tons of acquaintances, but that's about the depth of the relationships. Apparently I'm not that good at making deep friendships. I think I make a good friend...I would want to be my friend. But, alas. Here's what I think is the problem--I assume that people don't want to hang out with me, so I don't call them or anything to set stuff up, I wait to be asked. And I guess that isn't working out so well. I don't know why I assume that (actually I do, but it would take a really long time to go into all that here)--but you know what happens when you assume. So I will look forward to Manchester and a fresh start. Maybe I will start going by Lauren up there. I wanted to do that at LU, but I just didn't start doing it from the beginning, and it's hard to get people who already know you to call you something different. I thought it would be really hard to recognize people were talking to me if I went by a different name, but I had a French name this year, and that worked out nicely. We will see. I shall contemplate it over my break.

I really hope Beth can hook me up with a job. That would be awesome. I will have a real job. With a salary. I will get paid to type things into the computer, which is awesome because I can type really fast and really well. It will take me some time to get used to a desktop keyboard again since I'm so used to typing on my smaller laptopl keyboard. The keys aren't in exactly the same places. And apparently I will have to learn 10 key, but that shouldn't be too hard. I guess I will have a cubicle. That will be fun--I can decorate it with all my awesome Bon Jovi posters. Good thing I like small places...haha. I'm already thinking of things I want to buy with the money I will make, but that is a bad thing because I'm working to save the money so I can go to Manchester....grrr. I want a new laptop though. A mac. I also want a car, but that's probably pretty much out of the question unless I just work for a couple years rather than one semester. Hmm. But the car I want isn't practical--a car seat wouldn't fit in it, and I will have kids before I will need to buy a new car, so a 350z, while awesome, wouldn't be a smart buy. Plus they're crazy ezxpensive. But I really kinda do need a newer car because Manchester is 600 miles away, and I don't know how many 600 mile trips my 94 altima has left in it. Speaking of trips...last night I looked down at my spedometer at one point and saw that I was going 105 ( do NOT tell my mother this--I will never speak to any of you ever again). It's crazy, but I actually get better gas mileage going faster. I'm serious. It doesn't make any sense, but it's true.

Um....what else should I talk about? David--I've been holding off posting more deep pacifist posts since Tyler was in town. Shall we resume our dialogue? lol

*EDIT*--On all our bio tests, Dr. Carpenter puts a Bible verse as extra credit--1 point for the right book, 2 more for the right chapter, and another 2 for the right verse. Usually they're really obscure, but this one I got exactly!!!! book, chapter, and verse! Psalm 139:13--YESSS. I know it because Psalm 139 is my favorite Psalm. I just looked it up to see if I got the right verse...and I did. heck yes! I am way excited about that.

According to our research, you'll be dead by
September 2071 at age 85 - probable cause -
heart attack
YOU DIE:
84.5 years

AVERAGE FEMALE LIFE SPAN:
77.1 years As you can plainly see, you have more health & vitality than the average woman.

SWEET!! 85 is old.

You are a Social Liberal (73% permissive) and an... Economic Liberal (20% permissive) You are best described as a: Socialist Link: The Politics Test on Ok Cupid Also: The OkCupid Dating Persona Test

I can't make it show up on here, but they have a graph of all kinds of famous leaders and celebrities and where they fit in and whatnot, and I'm right on Hillary Clinton's face.

spiritual gift?

I'm starting to think that maybe my gift is faith. We have been studying that passage in Corinthians (the class). Dr. Williams says that we all have faith, but those with that spiritual gift are given an extra measure. I don't know. I'm not at all trying to sound superior (that was one of Paul's main arguments in his letter to Corinth!). But I really do believe that God and and will do anything. His power is infinite, and I believe that He still reveals Himself in those ways today to those who have the faith. I firmly believe that if for some reason it was needed, God could and would make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich appear in my hand (I don't know what that would be essential to one's salvation or necessary for God to do that, but I believe that he could and would if the occasion arose). If I felt strongly that God was calling me to jump off a cliff, I would do it (there would be some major prayer and fasting first and definite consultation with people who have a better discernment than I). This is why I am so excited about joining CPT. I know that God will protect me. It is a dangerous job. You definitely have to sign a waiver saying that if you are kidnapped, tortured, killed, or otherwise injured that CPT can't be held responsible. It's serious business. When CPT members hear gunfire, they run toward it. I'm not afraid (although I probably will be when it's me running toward the sounds of gunfire). Yes, I could die. But I trust that God will protect me. And even if He chooses not to, and I do die, I died obeying His call. I hope that this post doesn't make me sound like I've gone off the deep end. I haven't. I'm just expressing how deep my convictions are. And I truly mean every word that I have written.

gahhh.

Can I just say how much it sucks to lose $20. And not just misplace. It probably fell out of my pocket at the gas station last night, so now it is gone forever. So basically last night I spent 4 hours babysitting for 3/4 tank of gas. That is really depressing. I was going to use that $20 to go buy water. SUCK!!!!! I am really probably more upset by this than I should be, but $20 is a freaking lot of money to just lose.

more of my own thoughts on pacifism and a couple of art's quotes.

"I will never give up hope for anyne. There is something of God in every person that we can appeal to" ( Hebron Journal page 115). We are all made in God's image--even the murderers, kidnappers, and raposts. Don't you think that the part of us that is like God can be moved?

Can we trust God so far as to let go of everything? Even our children? Abraham was willing to sacrifice Isaac--the very fulfillment of God's promise to him.

Many would suggest that pacifism is a stance of weakness or fear, but anyone who knows much of anything about pacifism knows that it is anything but weak or fearful. It requires an enormous amount of faith and trust in Almighty God that He will prevail and that His will will be done. There is great fear in giving up control and putting your all in God's hands and having Him do with it as He wills. What the world sees as weakness and fear is strength and trust in God. He will protect you, and even if he chooses not to, you have been obedient to His call. The cowardly and fearful approach is what the world sees as courageous--defending yourself with violence, trusting in your own abilities rather than in God's power. This is a more radical faith than most people are comfortable with--it completely defies what the world says we should do in certain situations. But I believe that as followers of Christ, we are called to this type of radical faith--a chasing after Him and a placement of total trust in Him and obedience to His will, whatever that may be. He is faithful. ALWAYS. The question is whether or not you will give Him the chance to prove His faithfulness to you.

Here's what Art has to say about violence: "Violence is an act of desperation. Violence is the inevitable result of oppression" (p121).

favorite verses

1 Chronicles 29:11 "Yours, O LORD, is the greatness, and the power and the glory and the majesty and the splendor, for everything in heaven and on earth is yours. Yours, O LORD, is the kingdom; you are exhalted as head over all."

Psalm 90:14 "Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days."

Psalm 143:6 "I spread out my hands to you; my soul thirsts for you like a parched land."

Micah 6:8 "And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God."

Matthew 5:38-44 "You have heard that it was said, 'Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.'But I tell you, Do not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. And if someone wants to sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. If someone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles. Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you. You have heard that it was said, 'Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.' But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you."

John 3:30 "He must become greater and greater; I must become less and less."

Philippians 2:5 "Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus."

Colossians 3:12 "Therefore as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience." (my tattoo verse)

1 Corinthians 4:12-13 "We work hard with our own hands. When we are cursed, we bless; when we are persecuted, we endure it; when we are slandered, we answer kindly. Up to this moment, we have become the scum of the earth, the refuse of the world."

Hebrews 12:1-3 "Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart."

my theological worldview...umk....

You scored as Emergent/Postmodern. You are Emergent/Postmodern in your theology. You feel alienated from older forms of church, you don't think they connect to modern culture very well. No one knows the whole truth about God, and we have much to learn from each other, and so learning takes place in dialogue. Evangelism should take place in relationships rather than through crusades and altar-calls. People are interested in spirituality and want to ask questions, so the church should help them to do this. Emergent/Postmodern 96% Evangelical Holiness/Wesleyan 71% Charismatic/Pentecostal 61% Classical Liberal 57% Neo orthodox 57% Modern Liberal 46% Roman Catholic 29% Reformed Evangelical 21% Fundamentalist 14% What's your theological worldview? created with QuizFarm.com

decisions, decisions.

Kim and I talked ON THE PHONE *gasp* for a while last night, and I decided that I'm not going to come back to LU in the spring. I actually just went through and dropped all my classes.

Something very interesting has happened this week. I've been fasting and praying about what to do, and I think God answered. Know how one of my major reasons for staying through the end of the year was so that I didn't leave Caroline (my roommate) hanging by taking all the appliances and whatnot? Well, turns out, she and Melissa (one of my suitemates) are going to move in together, and Melissa's roommate is getting a private room. I would love a private room, but there is no way we can afford it. So, I'm taking this as a sign. Plus, I'm really getting fed up with the way lots of people are treating Lee Camp (UB professor and pacifist...). It's becoming a witch-hunt. People are not acting like Christians. It's really bad. LU is soo divided right now. It's just not a good situation, and I'm tired it. So, I will be home in 2 weeks. I still haven't told very many people (fasting makes you really weak!), and I really don't want to go into it a million times, but I imagine I will have to at some point. So, looks like I'll be finding a job somewhere, but I want it to be a good one--with a salary, not hourly wages. I want a job job. I need to save up all the money I can.

So, Kim thinks I need my own place. I don't disagree, but that would basically defeat the purpose of said job job if I suddenly had to pay rent and utilities and all that. Plus, I have the feeling that moving out wouldn't go over too well with Mom...and I'd likely be "punished" by having to pay for everything on my own. And that would not be good at all. So...that is frustrating. And Malachi stole my room at the Andersons' ; )

And everyone should go see the movie Bobby. It's very well done.